October Nightmares IV #25: DOOM (1996) by Steve Behling and Michael Stewart - Doom Guy Got His Really Big Gun

As someone who was raised by 80's and 90's culture, I know that sometimes the only thing you need for a plot is a macho-badass death machine armed with one-liners and more guns than an American high school. This is a lesson the 1996 Marvel comic book adaptation of Doom took to heart, and then some. Presumably this lesson was delivered by knuckle-duster adorning fist, clutching the torn-off testicles of several demons.

When it was released on PC in 1993, Doom became a cultural phenomenon. There was nothing else like it. Gamers loved the frantic, extremely gory (for the time) gameplay. Conservative Christians hated it for these reasons, having disregarded the notion that annihilating demons is highly Christian. Even Jesus gets in on the act in the Book of Revelation. Point is, this shit was exceedingly controversial and popular. Therefore, the push for a multi-media franchise was inevitable. And that leads us to this cheap tie-in.

Doom, the comic is absolutely glorious. To paraphrase Doom Guy: "Mine eyes can but weep as they bear witness to its majesty..." At first, the idea of a Doom comic seems way off base. Doom has a plot in the same way that Waitrose has a proper bargain section. Who would want to read 16 pages of a space marine running down a corridor and gunning down brown demons? Other than police officers.

But by acknowledging the game's lack of plot beyond its ultra-violent gameplay, the comic transcends into something truly amazing. It becomes a mockery of itself, 80's action movies, and grimdark 90's comics. The game's protagonist - a self-described "Berserker packin’ man and a half!” - is here rendered the archetypal 80's beefcake. He spouts a variety of brilliantly cheesy lines, likely making up for his stint as a silent protagonist in his video game career.

These lines range from the almost poetic - "At this particular moment in time, I don't think I have a healthier or more deeply-felt respect for any other object in the universe than this here Shotgun." - to the iconic: “YOU ARE HUGE! THAT MEANS YOU HAVE HUGE GUTS! RIP AND TEAR!”

Doom Guy is portrayed as either in the throes of 'roid rage, or in the middle of a mental breakdown. Given that he's witnessed the space station where he works, along with everyone who works in it, get destroyed by demons from Hell, that's fairly understandable. The comic begins with him in a Berserk-induced frenzy and it just gets crazier from there, as he searches for guns - each bigger than the last.  If you are not aware, Berserk is basically a power-up in the games which lets you punch faster and harder than Chris Brown that time Rihanna gave him backchat.

The games chose a 1st person perspective to make the experience more immersive. Well, Doom Guy of the comic breaks that 4th wall right down, comes into your house, and tears your cat into two EXTREME!-ly bloody chunks. He switches between internal and external monologues with reckless abandon - including pointing out "important doors", or commenting on a scene change with a "Now I'm in a completely different place!" Fucking hell, this is probably what it's like in the Whitehouse with Trump.

It's difficult to categorise Doom, the comic. The comic does its job as a tie-in. Doom's monsters (from zombies, imps, invisible pinkies, cacodemons, and cyberdemons) are well represented here. As are its collection of guns, including the BFG9000. But quality wise, the comic is incredibly low rent. Either it's just genuinely bad, which the cheap and generic artstyle is a testament to - gun models and scenery change from panel to panel. Or it's an ingenious lampoon of the childish power fantasies Hollywood unashamedly rolls out. I want to believe it's the latter. I enjoy the idea of Steve Behling and Michael Stewart rolling a couple of blunts and just letting the absolute carnage unfold. It hardly matters as, regardless of intent, it's a comedy gold mine.

I was hesitant to include this comic in October Nightmares for this very reason. This is Army of Darkness or Braindead style horror - ludicrously over-the-top and comically gory. But, given how much insanity the comic fits into a mere 16 pages, I felt it more than earned its place here.

There's one scene, in the middle, where Doom Guy falls into a vat of radioactive waste and angrily laments a world which doesn't dispose of such waste in an environmentally friendly fashion. We've got to think of the children. It's like something from a Steven Seagal film. This green speech comes, of course, right before Doom Guy cries out"oh the Humanity! My Big Gun is out of bullets! I can't believe it!" To which his fucking gun replies: "Better believe it solider!" Doom Guy casts his useless, massive gun aside; he's ready to search for an even bigger gun.

He'll cry when he's done killing.

Enjoyed this piece? Then leave a comment and share it about. Also, follow Iron on Facebook, Google Plus and Twitter to stay up to date. Stalker.